Do you go into orbit like a heat seeking missile at the slightest provocation; launch showers of verbal shrapnel at staff and work colleagues? Do your relationship dynamics make you feel youâ??ve done ten rounds with Tyson? Is a holiday in Baghdad starting to sound attractive?

Anger leads to depression and illness

Habitually â??losing itâ?? sends your blood pressure soaring, clocks up serious wear and tear on your adrenal glands, puts decades on your age-ometer and the fallout has an earth-shattering effect on relationships. Unsurprisingly research shows that children and adults who use anger as their primary communication method have a far higher incidence of depression and illness. Well, feeding your angerâ??s insatiable appetite doesnâ??t leave much energy to invest elsewhere.

Anger often hides fear and sadness

Hereâ??s the prognosis â?? an angry image is simply an advertisement of how afraid you are! Youâ??d rather be mad than admit to being sad. Bottled pain has poor preservative qualities; the longer itâ??s bottled the more explosive its potential. If your personal history embedded anger in your brain and youâ??re not contemplating a career as a suicide bomber, perfecting your conflict resolution skills really should be a priority. Is shouting louder or swearing in multiple languages your definition of an alternative communication method; or is defending yourself furiously claiming a large chunk of energy? Is your anger fuelled by brain-nuking addictions? Then you could make drawing sniper fire a highly paid profession, or conduct experiments in the rapid decomposition of vital organs.

Learn how to relax

Alternatively, if your internal stockpile of nuclear warheads makes George Bush envious, you might want to do something radical â?? RELAX! This too can become a habit. Breathe deeply; it defuses anger instantly! Visualize a peaceful solution. BE the solution; not part of the problem. Adapt your diet; stop ingesting substances that aggravate a short fuse, stop picking at emotional scabs, develop your sense of self esteem and exercise to drain excess adrenaline. Pump up your compromise expertise, take a spa break and if all this fails come to Zimbabwe and enroll for an Anger and Stress Management Seminar.

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Iâ??m serious! The peace is awesome; not even a fridge humming or a cellphone chirping to disturb the serenity. Our first practical session could involve a visit to a bank. This may resemble an airport departure lounge but attempting to expedite proceedings is strictly for uninformed foreigners, because the only thing it accomplishes is severely elevated blood pressure. You will learn to sit patiently with your suitcase (to accommodate the banknotes) and socialize to retain your sanity. During your brief six hour wait you can learn some new banking terms â?? old money vs new money, cash rates, cheque rates and RTGS rates, millions, trillions and quadzillions.

You might even be lucky enough to withdraw enough cash to buy a loaf of bread. If you think this sounds like fun and your appetite is as picky as a piranha, email me six months in advance, bring a suitcase full of Rand and we can practice chilling on the shores of the Zambezi!

While All4Women endeavours to ensure health articles are based on scientific research, health articles should not be considered as a replacement for professional medical advice. Should you have concerns related to this content, it is advised that you discuss them with your personal healthcare provider.