The big, unavoidable, often disastrous problem with people is that they are human, and that means they are flawed.

It is said, â??To err is humanâ?, so you can guarantee that, since your partner is human, he/she is going to let you down. It is an indisputable fact. This is why this weekâ??s letter, H, is for happiness.

You are responsible for your own happiness, not your partner. Your relationship will only serve to shine a spotlight on who you already are.

In charge or a victim? Your relationship will reveal the answer

If you have chosen to be in charge of your own happiness or a victim to someone else’s humanity, the relationship will reveal it.

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You see, if you give the other person the responsibility for making you happy then you also give them the power to make you sad, and it becomes very difficult to see them for who they are and not just their faults.

If you give the other person the responsibility for making you happy then you also give them the power to make you sad.

Imagine being in charge of your partnerâ??s happiness

It is a lot of responsibility to have, and when you drop the ball you are also held responsible for making them sad. It will kill a relationship quickly if you give away your power like that, as no one wants it.

The best kind of relationship is the one that is free from this kind of responsibility and expectation

If your partner feels that they are responsible for making you happy or sad, he/she will never be able to relax and be themselves, and eventually they will feel suffocated.

You need to realise that happiness is a choice that you need to make, you need to accept that your partner will let you down at least once or twice, as you will let them down.

If you are single, no relationship can make you happy, it can only make you happier.

If you are married, be the captain of your own happiness and give your relationship the space it needs to breathe.