If you’re struggling with your sex life, a simple conversation with your partner is a great place to start

Sex is an undeniable part of most relationships. Regardless of how often you do the deed, it should feel pleasurable and exciting to both partners. However, our own problems and professional lives consume us so much that often we tend to forget about our lover. While everyone ends up in an occasional ‘love ruts’, consistently not having sex can ruin even the most stable relationships.

What causes someone to stop wanting sex in a relationship?

Experts say that people often blame their lack of interest, on ageing or changing habits. This can happen in a long-term relationship as well as with those just starting to see each other. Sometimes, the reason you’re not making love as much as before is simple, like working long hours or being on medication that lowers the libido, but at other times, your sexless relationship can signify underlying problems.

In fact, partners subtly show each other that they may not trust each other when they refuse physical intimacy. Since trust is a vital component of every healthy long-term partnership, refusing to have sex can cause significant damage to the relationship.

A lack of sex can also cause other issues that ultimately affect your relationship in many harmful ways

Once both partners establish a sex life together, any change in the pattern they create causes paranoia and fear. Each person in the relationship starts wondering whether they’re still attractive or if their partner is having an affair.

WIN a R 2,000 Woolworths Voucher

Subscribe to our Free Daily All4Women Newsletter to enter

READ MORE: Is an open relationship for you? Here’s what you need to know

So what can you do to avoid ending your relationship?

Therapists and psychologists have a lot to say about rebooting your sexual life. They often recommend that struggling couples attend couples counselling, which can aid their communication issues. Conversely, a couple struggling with their sex life could try switching to an open relationship if both parties agree. This, in turn, would allow the partner with the higher libido to get sex somewhere else while still maintaining the emotional connection within the relationship.

There’s no single answer to suit all situations

When your sex life declines, there’s no single answer to the problem, but it certainly doesn’t mean that your relationship is over.

Obviously, whether or not you engage in sexual intercourse is a personal choice. Nevertheless, if a couple begins their relationship with a regular sex life, a sudden change in the frequency of sex can signify issues that the partners should address.

If you’re struggling with your sex life, a conversation with your partner is a great place to start. Communicating will help you both understand how you can each stay sexually fulfilled. Perhaps it’s a simple misunderstanding that you and your partner can solve together!

READ MORE: Eat for better sex! Rev up your sex life by eating these 7 foods

This article was first published on Unwritten.