Introducing Annie – All4Women’s very own agony aunt. She’s a qualified social worker and single mom of five so whatever your problem, she’s possibly been there too and can offer sympathy, support and some wise advice.
Many of you send us emails asking for advice. Now we have Annie on board to answer:
“I have recently gotten divorced. Not only did my ex-husband run off with another woman, he left me with a pile of debt and three kids to take care of. I am angry most of the time and I canâ??t even open the bills that keep coming in. I canâ??t see a way out. I am feeling desperate and I am getting more and more depressed. Please help”.
Thank you for your letter. I am sorry to hear that you are going through such a hard time! I hear your hurt and frustration. Anger is often the way we choose to give expression to those underlying feelings.
I am glad that YOU are the boss of your situation, yourself and your children because when you feel unable to cope you know how to ask for help. Well done!
It is important to remember that you are not alone! As Winnie the Pooh said: “You’re braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think!”
Start opening those bills and talk to the meanies asking you for money. While you donâ??t need to tell them the money is being spent by the new girlfriend to buy shoes, most companies will understand that you are in a crisis and you can agree on a small monthly amount that you can afford.
Joining a divorce care group will put you in touch with other people in going through the same things that you are. Your married girlfriends may be helpful but if your ex has inherited couple friends in the divorce, it may be a good time to make some new single girlfriends who can plot fantasy revenge schemes with you over a glass of wine. You can do it!