What makes a song happy is not the words being sung, but the melody it is sung to. Take a song about a relationship and play it in a minor key and you have an unhappy song: play it in a major key and it is a happy song.

What do you focus on, the minors or the majors?

This weekâ??s letter is G – for gratitude.

Most relationships go bad for very simple reasons, and it is actually quite rare that they go bad for reasons such as abuse or unfaithfulness.

Relationships go bad for the same reason that you get tired of that new cell phone: it becomes familiar and you stop appreciating it for the things that used to appeal to you.

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Relationships go bad for the same reason that you get tired of that new cell phone: it becomes familiar and you stop appreciating it for the things that used to appeal to you

It is regrettable to compare a relationship to a possession, but in truth people treat relationship and partners as possessions, and tire of them as they tire of possessions.

This is why gratitude is so important. Over time you become so accustomed to the other person that the good stuff no longer delights and all you can see is the bad stuff.

I know that it isnâ??t easy to see things that you should be grateful for, and this is why you should get a notebook and do a daily list of one to three things about your partner and relationship that you are grateful for.

Focus on the positive/major things and make your relationship song a happy one

This is possibly one of the most difficult things to do though. Negative focus is such an ingrained habit that it will take effort and determination to focus on gratitude for the good stuff.

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