Last updated on Jun 10th, 2021 at 04:52 pm
You only get one chance to make a first impression, make it count! Here are some first date pitfalls to avoid…
We all know that the first date determines whether or not there will be a second date. The first date is the time to step up your game, get your manners in check and be on your best behaviour (which includes not getting drunk and blabbing about your issues).
First impressions are the only ones that count in the beginning, so you have to use that one opportunity to hold your dateâ??s attention, get him interested to know more about you and want to see you again. Thatâ??s quite a lot of pressure, so here are a few tips to get you through the first date in order to get the â??next-day call backâ?…
Show your interest through appearance
Before speaking to you, he will see you. Showing effort in your appearance is almost guaranteed to get the date off to a good start â?? with a compliment which will raise your confidence levels and hold his attention.
Chances are highly unlikely that the venue of your first date will be a surprise. If you are unsure of the vibe of the place, do some research, ask friends, look the venue up on the net or even get the number and call. Dressing appropriately is a big factor because if you feel under or over dressed you are bound to feel uncomfortable.
Donâ??t be excessively critical
Complaining about food, people and work puts a dampener on the date because complaining is more of a one-person conversation â?? there isnâ??t much for the listener to say.
This will also raise a lot of concerns in his mind that you are a person who focuses on the negative â?? leaving him wondering how long it will take you to notice the bad in him.
This is a tricky one because naturally you would like to impress your date with talk of intelligence, physique, education and finance. Too much of this sort of talk can really make people feel uncomfortable and annoyed, and not enough means you donâ??t get to show him the best parts of yourself.
If you would really like to bring up an accomplishment, do so (without embellishing) and then encourage the other person to share one of their proudest moments with you. This will allow you to show your best assets without sounding like you are bragging, and give you the opportunity to get answers for the questions you might be afraid to ask.
A good portion of dating requires sharing information about one another and some are eager to share even their darkest secrets. This however should be done in stages, as those who share too much too quickly or ask questions of their date that might be uncomfortable, may spoil the entire event.
Though your willingness to share is a good sign of being open, remember that some people are shy and you may need to take a little time before getting personal.
If it is difficult for you to pay attention on your first date on the journey to find new love in your life, it is assumed that your inattentiveness will only increase over time. During a date it is important to keep your focus on the person with whom you chose to spend time so that they can see youâ??re interested. To take the other personâ??s time for granted is almost going to guarantee that you get crossed off of their list of potentials.
This includes being late for a date (unless you have a really good reason, and you at least let them know youâ??re running late).
Leave the ex at home
This may seem like an obvious one, but there will still be the odd person who will bring up what a great or terrible cook their ex was, or that the venue of the current date is where you and your ex shared your first kiss. Remember there is a reason that he is your ex â?? he is not to be taken on your new ventures. This makes for uncomfortable and boring conversation.
You may think that bashing your latest ex will indicate to your new date that you are over the relationship â?? it doesnâ??t. All it says is that you still think about him. Remember, the opposite of love is not hate, itâ??s apathy. Rather donâ??t bring him up at all.
Donâ??t let nerves get the better of you. Keep yourself relaxed by doing all that you can to reduce the pressure of the occasion.
Always remember that arrogance is not appealing, but confidence is â?? know the difference. Enjoy it and pay enough attention to get to know your date as well as you possibly can so that you will know if you would like the dates to continue.