Last updated on Jun 10th, 2021 at 06:23 pm

It takes effort, but a happy marriage is worth it!

Finding your one true love in life is hard enough, don’t you think? But then trying keeping your “happily ever after” marriage actually happy takes a whole new level of commitment and effort.

Divorce rates are discouragingly high (and even higher among second and third marriages).

So, how do you keep your marriage from becoming a casualty?

Host and YourTango Senior VP of Experts Melanie Gorman asked a panel of our experts this very question. She gathered: divorce coach Karen Finn; matchmaker and dating coach Jasbina Ahluwalia; counsellor and therapist Dr. Pat Love; and, relationship trainer Julie Nise to share their wisdom about how to keep a modern marriage strong.

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And the experts all agree – a fun and fulfilling marriage is entirely possible, if you consistently invest time and energy in it.

“Marriage comes first”

“The marriage is the most important thing,” says Julie Nise. “If something affects the marriage in terms of what you like, or what you need, or what you want, [it’s] got to go. Marriage comes first.”

Of course, we already know this. We know that the distractions and demands of life should never nudge our marriage to the back burner – but, let’s be honest, they do.

So, to help us keep our spouse front and centre, our experts explored the topic of safe guarding your marriage from the following angles:

  • How limiting beliefs get in the way of healthy connection in your relationship
  • Whether your list of ideal expectations reflects your true needs or your wants
  • How to decide which comes first – the marriage or the individual
  • How to maintain connection every day, even during conflict or mundane tasks
  • The importance of knowing what’s most important to your spouse

So, check out the video below to learn some loving ways to help your marriage last: