Isnâ??t it funny that we live in a society where kind words are taken with such surprise?
I remember yelling across a crowded street to a woman in traditional dress. It was a little brash, and I blush at the memory, but I had to catch her before she hurried by.
She was, I assume, a domestic worker, for she was hurrying into a complex with a group of other women, all wearing comfortable shoes.
Her traditional dress was a brilliant yellow, and in the cold morning, she lit up the grey, polluted air like a ray of sunshine. She knew it too, for her eyes were bright, but the women were late, I think, and werenâ??t focused on anything but the speed of their steps.
I screamed like a banshee through the cars and the people, and the group of women stopped, turned, and grinned as if winter had lifted.
Then they began to applaud the woman in their midst, cheering for her as if they saw her properly for the first time, and they shouted agreement back at me across the street, â??Yes! She is beautiful!â?
Many a woman, rushed and frantic in the morning, is accompanied by the thought, â??Iâ??m so uglyâ? or, â??I look so fat in thisâ?. All around the world, women open their cupboards and think, â??I have nothing to wearâ?.
Husbands say what they think their wives want to hear, or so women tend to feel, not taking their comments seriously. Male friends who pass comments are surely just flirting, while strangers who comment are suspicious and need to be treated with caution.
It begs the question, that if men donâ??t make women feel beautiful, who does?
Certainly not acquaintances and colleagues, for there is too much competition there. The woman who dresses well, looking bright and breezy, may be far too much of a threat – her self-assurance a real problem.
The woman who is dowdy and neglected has a long way to go to get to the top because she is seen as not smart enough – not lively enough.
I have made it my lifeâ??s mission to tell all women when they look beautiful. After all, no one else is going to do it.
â??Do unto others as you will have do unto youâ? is my motherâ??s quote inside of my mind, and it is true, in that most of the time, the only person who notices how other women look, is the one who is feeling displaced.
Women who feel insecure, feel unattractive
Women are beautiful, so much so, that often one canâ??t help but to stop and watch them pass by, their heads held up, their backs straight. It has nothing to do with the garments they wear, but is so much more about the energy they hold within them.
These are the women I speak to
I am a stranger to them, someone passing by, with no reason to stop, other than the fact that they have halted me in my tracks, signalling a moment in time, as if looking upon an art work. I say out loud, â??Excuse me? I just wanted to let you know how absolutely beautiful you look.â?
In most cases, the recipients of my message will stop walking, driving, shopping, writing, to say thank you, a look of awe on their faces. There is an uncertainty in how to react to me.
I am certain, that in that instant, my gesture was taken to heart by the woman I stopped that morning
I have no doubt that the reaction of her friends was stored somewhere within her, and I know, that on that particular day, she felt beautiful and inspired.
I will never know if she walked on air for the rest of the day, but I will always remember that I did.
It seems only women can inspire other women, and sadly, we donâ??t do it enough.